Schwyzertütsch!

Schwyzertütsch = Schweizer Deutsch = Swiss German

As soon as I arrived in Switzerland, I realized that I, in fact, do not speak the language. Sure, I’m fluent in German, but Swiss German shares little more than a similar name. No joke: In the first few days, I would hear people talking on the street and on the train and think, “Are they speaking French? Swedish? Japanese?”
The second day I was here, I was talking with a Swiss student on my floor in the communal kitchen. “Yeah, some people say it sounds like a throat disease…” Well, that’s a flattering way to describe the constant interjection of throaty “ch” sounds in every other word. Ah hah! Maybe that’s why Switzerland’s country abbreviation is “CH.” (Truth: It actually is an abbreviation of Confoederatio Helvetica, the Latin name of the Swiss Confederation.)
It’s such a charming language, though. Imagine someone speaking German, but with a softer, more sing-songy quality. Today I considered it a small success when I could understand about half of the words the guy at the cell-phone store said. Yes, I was complaining because my cell-phone refused to connect with its network. His first three words were in High German, then I think he slid into the local dialect to keep me from continuing my complaint. It worked. I smiled, nodded, and left.

(Later note: The cell-phone works now, all is well with the world. Shameless advert: Get skype! PC to PC calls are free and the sound quality is just as good. Yay for around-the-world conversations for free!)

A snapshot of downtown Bern. Can you believe that this is a capital city? UNESCO also officially calls it "pretty cool," meaning the medieval downtown is a World Heritage Site.

Side note: I live in an ugly, concrete apartment in the high-rise suburbs, but still, I'm only a 5 minute train ride from this!